A Bright Spot
After reading Russell Little’s blog today I felt relieved. Relieved because I’m not the only one who is forced to quiet the negativity my brain delivers. For some bizarre reason, (maybe originating back in the stone age) our brains tend to drift towards the negative. Let your brain have free reign and it will convince you life is horrible and you’ll starve to death by tomorrow if you don’t eat those Cheetos sitting in the cabinet.
I don’t know about other writers but I have bouts of serious self-doubt. Should I bother with writing? Continue or quit? Give it a bit more time or throw in the towel and move on with life? These questions buzz around my neurons on a regular basis. I have yet to finish two manuscripts- I’ve been working on them long enough they’re getting a bit moldy. My life is chaotic enough without stressing about a writing schedule. It's easy to think it doesn't really matter anyway, maybe it's time to stop.
BUT, then I meet that one person at the store, or at the service desk while I schedule a service call on my brand new fridge, who laughs when I tell them about my books. A good laugh, not at the thought of an older gal writing, but because the story line catches their funny bone. The service center gal was so sweet when I called and explained our new fridge’s ice maker wasn’t working properly. Her Tennessee accent made me ache for home. (I know, I know. I’ve been in northeast Ohio for 39 years, but Texas is HOME.) After the appointment was scheduled I told her about the Peg Shaw series and after her laughter quieted, she told me she was going to check out my website as soon as we were off the phone. She’d had a rough day and talking with me had added a bright spot.
Those are the moments I live for! Those minutes out of my life make it worthwhile. For a time they put to rest the questions, the doubts, and even the fears I have about my work. When the doubts and fears start to creep back in I remind myself of these moments. I remind myself of the times in my life when I needed that good book, cup of coffee, and a chance to lose myself in a story for a while. And that's what gets me writing again.